Bruno has been operations director of a 350-employee distribution center for six months. He spent the previous ten years at that same center, and two of his longtime friends, David and Simon, are now part of his management team. These friendships are real, going back years of working side by side.

Bruno has never formally thought through how to manage these relationships in his new role. He naturally keeps having lunch with David and Simon several times a week, consulting them informally before leadership meetings, and giving them first pick of the most exciting projects. To him, it's simply the normal expression of trust that's been earned.

Six months after his promotion, Bruno finds a letter on his desk, signed by eight members of his management team, addressed to HR, documenting in detail what it calls "systematic favoritism." Bruno is genuinely shocked and hurt: he never intended to create inequities — he simply never measured the effect of his behavior on others.

💬 The Eskalon moment

Even before taking the role, Bruno could have asked Eskalon: "Two of my best friends are now part of my management team. How do I manage this transition to stay fair without destroying our friendships?" The answer first helps him understand that the shift from colleague to manager requires an explicit redefinition of professional relationships — not the end of the friendships, but an adjustment to how they're expressed at work.

Eskalon suggests he have a frank conversation with David and Simon from the very first days, acknowledging the value of the friendship while clearly naming the adjustments needed for professional decisions to be seen as fair by the whole team. He also gets concrete guidelines: transparent rotation of exciting projects, sharing information in full team meetings before any one-on-one consultation, objective criteria for training decisions.

With this framework in place from the start, the same friendships continue to exist, but they no longer translate into privileged access perceived by the rest of the team. Trust between Bruno and his management team is built on clear, visible rules rather than the impression of an inner circle. A letter signed by eight people never reaches HR, because the problem it would have flagged simply never had the chance to take root.